::today::

1. i would cry right now if i wasn't concerned about ruining my eye makeup
2. will continue to decrease expectations and live more for the moment
3. is in love with this new singer, AYO
4. won't listen to Amy Winehouse
5. will listen to Only Heart, my favorite John Mayer song
6. i can't understand, and will leave it like that
7. i am thinking about straight hair

i think i attract selfish and needy people because i can be selfish and needy. i also believe that selfish and needy people enjoy this mirror i put up during conversation. listening is the most powerful tool i possess.

with those truths, it is damn near inevtitable that i will begin to feel used and downtrodden during most relationships i have...be it with my mom, my coworkers and my distant and close friends.

i want to be alone more and attached less. i wish i could conjure up tirades and make people feel like shit for hurting me. i wish i could understand others less and project my point of view more.

today i am happy for contentment. even though presently, i am not content. i am happy for the emotion, the idea, though it is fleeting today...it will arrive again soon enough.